


Barbie and the Black Plague

by shannonjie



Category: Barbie: Life in the Dreamhouse
Genre: Crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 04:19:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11661492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shannonjie/pseuds/shannonjie
Summary: Barbie gets the black plague also i wrote this in 7th grade don't drag me.





	Barbie and the Black Plague

“Come on, Barbie. You don’t have a time machine for nothing!” exclaims Skipper. “There’s got to be a reason that those science people gave it to you. Besides, I’m doing a report on medieval Europe and the best way to learn is to experience it firsthand.”

“Skipper, I was not given that time machine so that you can work on your history project,” I sass back.

“Please, I really need it. Don’t you want me to succeed in life, older sister?” Skipper pleads, using her puppy dog face to try and sway my decision.

“No, don’t try and guilt trip me, little devil. I know that you just want to check out the time machine,” I retort.

In the middle of my sentence, Chelsea bounces into the room. “What are we talking ‘bout, Barbie?”

“Your older sister wants to use the new time machine to go back to medieval Europe so she can write her report. Apparently dear Skipper is above actually opening a textbook and doing research like everyone else.”

“No, it’s just… If you have a time machine why not use it?” Skipper replies.

“That’s true… Fine, we’ll go, but we have to bring Chelsea and Stacie too. And Ken, he can protect us in case anything happens.” I say, giving in.

The time machine was a red box about the size of the TARDIS from Doctor Who. It had one large window and a large amount of buttons, levers, and handles. Fortunately, there was no big, red button that said “DO NOT TOUCH.” I press a short series of buttons and pulled three levers, and with a “Whoosh,” we were heading to medieval Europe.

“Wow, this place is sort of gross,” Skipper says, as she steps over piles of cow dung on the street. “Where are we?”

“We’re in England during the high middle ages. You realize that we are smack-dab in the middle of the black plague, right?” I reply.

“Dang, I knew I should have listened when my science teacher was talking about this colored death thing,” Skipper sullenly says.

“Ew, all these people keep coughing. It’s a lot of work making sure that their coughs don’t touch me,” shrieks Raquelle, my sort of frenemy says. She has dark black hair and she’s wearing a black layered skirt and a white tank top. Over the tank top, she has a cropped, green bolero jacket and gold necklaces. Needless to say, Raquelle is not dressed for the right time period. Then again, none of us are, especially not me.

“Oh, geez, sis. You need to lighten up a little, you’re not going to die,” Ryan, Raquelle’s brother says.

“Skipper, people are going to think you’re a witch because of the colors in your hair and your headphones,” I warn. I’m wearing a skirt that would be considered sinful in the time we are currently in. “Hey, where’s Chelsea? I don’t see her anywhere.”

“Yeah, where is she? Have you seen her since we got here, Stacie?” Skipper curiously inquires.

“No, maybe she just wandered off. Yeah, she probably just saw something interesting and went to look at it,” Stacie confidently replied.

I quickly start walking around, saying “Well, then we have to get going and find her.” Scanning the entire area, the entire group, Skipper, Stacie, Ken, Raquelle, Ryan, and I can’t find the young girl anywhere. “Excuse me, have you seen a little blond girl with pigtails and a pink dress?” I ask a bedraggled old man sitting on the side of the narrow dirt road.

“Huh, what little girl you talkin’ about?” the old man coughs, directly onto me. 

“Oh, no, I’m going to get the plague! I’m gonna die! What are we going to do?” I frantically shriek, “Are you sick? Are you dying? What’s wrong with you, old man?”

“Calm down, Barbie. I can just jump back to 2014 and get the medicine for the bubonic plague,” Ken reassures me. “So, you just go lay down somewhere where nobody will come in contact with you, and I’ll go. Everything will be fine.”

“Okay, sounds like a plan. NOT! I’m going to die, Ken! I’m going to DIE! Everything is NOT fine! I’ll never see Chelsea again! Chelsea, where are you?” I scream hysterically. This is absolutely terrifying, I’m going to die. I should go lie down so that nobody else will die. I head away from all of my friends; the beginning of my solitude. 

“Hello, are you well? We, my maid and I, heard you from where we were,” two girls about the age of fifteen ask me. They have olive skin and dark hair. One of them is wearing a long, purple dress, and the other one is wearing a long, black skirt and a loose, green shirt. “Your dress is awfully short, and shiny. I like the sparkles, but it’s much too short,” the one with the purple dress says. 

“I can see her ankles, Lady Isabelle!” the one with the skirt and shirt says.

“Oh, right, I’m Lady Isabelle and this is my maid, Neive. Did you get the sickness, too? Many people in our community have been dying from the sickness. Nobody really knows what to do about it, though. All the doctors just give out medicines that don’t help. There’s lots of blood-letting, too. Blood-letting is supposed to keep your body in balance and get rid of the germs, but everyone is still dying.”

“Yes, I got the sickness, do you know what I can do?” I say.

“Nothing, you do nothing. What happens is this; you get sick, and you have to be alone so that you won’t infect anyone else. You’ll slowly get worse and worse, and you’ll keep coughing. Eventually, you die,” Neive says solemnly. By now, Ken, Raquelle and Stacie have already gone back to 2014 and everyone else is searching for Chelsea. I can just imagine it, Ken getting back to the Dreamhouse and calling Nikki and Theresa, telling them the news. They’d freak out and begin frantically calling every doctor trying to find the medicine for the bubonic plague. Ken would look through every single compartment and drawer in the entire Dreamhouse, desperately looking for anything that could cure the plague. The doctors would probably tell them that he had to go to some special place to get the medicine. Eventually they’d get the medicine, but knowing the three that we sent, they’d probably not know where the time machine was.

“Are you okay, you seemed very distracted for a moment,” Isabelle asks me.

“Yeah, I was just thinking about something,” I answer. This has been a long day, and it’s not even noon yet. In one day, I’ve traveled back in time, lost my little sister, contracted the bubonic plague, and sent my boyfriend and friend’s sister back to the future. 

“You keep going to the heavens in your mind. Wake up, get your head back to earth, girl,” Neive says to me. Speaking of my head, it doesn’t feel too good

“Yeah, I’ll be alright, I just need to rest. Do you have somewhere I can lie down?” I yawn.

“Oh, yes, come and we’ll return to Isabelle’s house where you can get some rest.” Neive replies.

“Sweet.”

“I see no sugar anywhere,” Isabelle says, confused.

“Nevermind, it doesn’t matter,” I answer.

We head far a dirt road until we reached a gorgeous home about half the size of the Dreamhouse. Isabelle and Skipper head down a long corridor as Neive takes me to a room that I can sleep in. The room has heavy gold brocade curtains and beautiful rose wallpaper. In the middle of the room, there is a large bed with a canopy and lots of pillows and blankets. Unfortunately, there isn’t any pink in the room, but I guess it’s okay. I lay on the extravagant bed and fall asleep the moment my head hits the pillows.

“She looks funny when she sleeps,”

“Hush, Chelscotch, let her sleep.”

“Oh my gosh, this is totally going on my blog!”

“Really, did I not just tell your sister to be quiet, Skipnia?”

What is with these names? Chelscotch, Skipnia? Who are these people and what is wrong with their parents?

“Let Evpraksiya sleep.”

I sit up and groggily ask, “What happened?”

“Oh, good, you’re up. According to your sisters, you had a friend, Ryan, and you do not know where he is. Is this true?” Isabelle asks.

“Huh, oh, yeah. What happened to him? Who are Skipnia, Chelscotch, and Evpraksiya?”

“You and your sisters. Did you forget this? Is it because of the plague?” Chelsea answers.

“You are my sister, nut.”

“Yeah, and my name’s Chelscotch. Oh, Ryan fell into a river and they found his body.”

“Ryan’s dead?” I ask.

“Yeah, it was really gross. I don’t know how we’re going to tell Raquelle that her only sibling is dead. That’s a conversation I’m not looking forward to,” Skipper says while rapidly typing on her phone. I swear, that girl is all kinds of stupid. Why on earth does she have her iPhone out in medieval Europe?

“Anyway, are you feeling better at all, Evpraksiya?” Neive asks me.

“Yeah, I’m just wondering when Ken will be back with the medicine.”

“Well, I really do have to do some research for that report I have,” Skipper says and then walks out of the door. Chelsea heads out of the room some time after Skipper to go explore. Neive stays by my side as I drift in and out of sleep, hacking out my lungs every time I wake up. Neive occasionally dabs my forehead with a cool towel and gives me water to drink. I float in and out of consciousness until I can no longer tell what day it is, much less the time. All of a sudden, I hear a door slam as Neive gives me some water to drink. Skipper quickly runs into the room, chest heaving as she pants heavily.

“What happened, Skipper?” I croak out.

“I… research...notes...iPhone...villagers saw...witch,” she pants out.

“You took research notes about villagers seeing a witch on your iPhone?” I guess. Apparently I’m wrong, because Skipper just shakes her head. “You were taking notes on your phone, and the villagers saw,” I try again, “Now they think that you’re a witch?”

“Yup,” by now, Skipper has caught her breath and can speak normally.

“Gods, Skipper, I told you not to use your phone!” I weakly exclaim.

“Is your sister’s name not Skipnia?”Neive asks confusedly.

“Oh, right. What did I tell you, Skipnia?” I say.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to get caught.”

“Whatever, how long have I been asleep?”  
“A few days, Evpraksiya,” Isabelle says as she pops her head into the room. A few days! I’ve been asleep for a few days. This is insane. All of a sudden, we hear loud shouting and bangs on the door.

“One moment, please,” I hear Isabelle say. She opens the door, only to find the entire town at her doorstep with torches and and pitchforks. This is a good old-fashioned mob. 

There are collective shouts of, “Burn the witch!” and, “Let’s burn the entire house!”

With a “whoosh” and a “slup,” a red TARDIS appears with Ken, Raquelle, and Stacie in it.

“Wow, perfect timing,” Skipper says as everyone steps out of the time machine. “There’s a crazy mob out there that wants to burn me at the stake. You know, I could really go for some steak right now. When we get back home, can we eat some steak?”

“Did you find the cure? Oh, Raquelle, just so you know, Ryan’s dead,” I sadly state.

“Yeah, about that, we didn’t find the cure, but if we go back home, everything will go back to normal,” Ken replies just as Raquelle shrieks,

“You let my only brother die! How could you? While I was there saving you?”

“It’ll be okay, just give it time. Anyway, we really need to go back home so that you don’t die, Barbie,” Ken says.

“Okay, let’s go get Chelsea.”

“But what about Neive and Isabelle? If we leave, they’ll be burned at the stake,” Skipper says.  
“We can bring them,” I reply.

“Leggo, y’all!” Chelsea shouts as she swaggers into the room. “Look at my swag, peeps!”

“Look at your what, what’s?” Neive asks.

“It’s Russian, don’t worry about it.” With that, we all hop into the TARDIS and go home where everything is back to normal. Skipper finishes her report, and a few weeks later she has another report on the American Revolution, but that’s another story for another time. Needless to say, I’m not going back to medieval Europe anytime soon. Or ever, yeah, I’m never going back. On another note, Isabelle and Neive are living with us and they’re getting along with Nikki and Theresa smashingly. Skipper gave them haircuts, jeans, converse, and some nice t-shirts. Ryan was fine. A bit confused when Raquelle hug-tackled him with tears streaming down her face, but fine nonetheless. All in all, everything has worked its way out.


End file.
